Pregnancy and Postpartum Archives - Page 3 of 8

Colostrum is Enough

January 18, 2017 by Larisha Campbell

Colostrum is enough.

If you don’t read anything else I write below, please tell yourself that colostrum is enough to nourish and feed your baby.

I was fortunate enough to have found an amazing support group of moms before having our first girl. Not only were there experienced moms in my group, but there were L&D nurses, lactation consultants, doulas, midwives, and even an IBCLC with decades of experience. I can’t say that I would have been as successful at breastfeeding without these groups and these amazing women standing by my side through every difficult moment, especially with my first.

It’s seem funny to think that I had times when I questioned myself or my milk as I’ve now breastfed for 1,500 consecutive days. However, there were absolutely times where I did. Most of those questions came in the first few weeks of having a child, but especially the first few days.

Why was my baby crying constantly?
Why was she sleeping so much?
Why did she nurse for 3 minutes, unlatch, and then cry again 5 minutes later?
Why did it seem like she was nursing every hour for an hour around the clock?
Why can I barely get anything out if I try to hand express? (or pump)

This and so many more questions filled my mind and that was only in the first 24 hours after birth. No one wants to starve their child, but our country also isn’t set up in a way that supports knowledge given out accurately either. We seem to forget in our after-birth high that millions of women have done this before us in a time where formula wasn’t readily available. Yet, in still, we allow formula reps to push sugar laden pre-made mixtures down the throats of this life we just created without question, because “they know best”. Do they? Or is your body, the same body that created a new organ to nourish a new human being in a matter of months, actually know what it’s doing?

Please stop questioning your body’s ability to provide for your child.

Colostrum is 100% enough to feed your baby until your milk comes in whether that’s day 1 or day 5. Whether you have a 5lb baby or a 10lb baby.

Colostrum is the yellowish, thick, milk that is extremely high in carbs, antibodies, and protein produce as the perfect first food for your baby. Colostrum also acts as a laxative to help pass stools in the early days, thus expelling meconium and bilirubin. While it’s low in volume, the more often you breastfeed those first few days, the faster your milk will come in. Every time that you give formula instead of putting your baby at your breast, you are halting that process.

Your mature milk typically comes in around day three or four. For most moms, they are home by this time. Therefore, unless there is a medical emergency, there’s no reason why formula should be given to a breastfeeding mother in the hospital.

3 Goals for New Baby

Breastfeed 8-12 times every 24 hours after birth (the more the better).
- Strictly breastfeeding mothers cannot overfeed their baby, but they can underfeed
Watch diaper output
- Whether you can hand express or pump 1/2 teaspoon or 2 ounces doesn’t matter. Every mother is different. What matters is that your baby is peeing and pooping. Typically one wet and one dirty diaper for every day of life (1 diaper each on Day 1, 2 diapers each on day 2, etc). Around day 4-5 when your milk starts to come in, you can expect at least 5-6 wet diapers a day.
Watch weight (the baby’s weight, not yours)
- You will have a weight check at around 3 days, 1 week, 2 week. If you received any fluids during your labor, this could inflate the baby’s weight loss and shouldn’t be counted towards birth weight.
- Make sure they are using the same scale with the same amount of clothes every time (preferably naked)

Diaper output and weight are literally the only things you should be watching. No matter how often the baby cries, no matter how often they unlatch and relatch, just nurse.

Grab a box of chocolates, a gallon of water, and hang out on the couch to binge watch your favorite Netflix series.

Remember, your baby’s stomach is the size of a marble on day one. Not much needs to come out to fill that up!

Breastfeeding isn’t a cake walk, but your colostrum is enough.

Disclosure: We are not a medical professional and the information offered here is our opinion based on our knowledge and education. If concerned, it’s best to seek out information on your own and speak with your own medical professionals that you trust. We always recommend seeing a lactation consultant for breastfeeding concerns.

It Happened #RoadtoTubalat30

December 21, 2016 by Larisha Campbell

Read our Introduction to #RoadToTubalAt30 Series First here.

November 25, 2016.

Surgery day arrived.

I checked into the hospital around 11am (side note: not eating after midnight usually sucks, so I highly recommend scheduling the day after a holiday. I was still pretty full from Thanksgiving AND I had leftovers for after surgery!). After changing into the hospital gown, getting my vitals checked, and taking a pregnancy test (just in case), it was a waiting period. Of course that left me with nothing but time to think about the decision I was making even more. I was told my doctor would be in after she finished the current surgery she was doing. Once she came in, she asked one more time, “Are you sure this is what you want to do?” I commend them for making sure, but I was definitely over being asked by this point.

It was around 12:30pm before I would be taken into surgery. The anesthesiologist came in and said they would be putting the medicine in my IV to knock me out. I don’t remember going past the curtain and the next thing I remember was waking up so thirsty.

The recovery begins.

I remember feeling so much better than I imagined. It felt like the worst period cramps I’ve ever had, but definitely better than what I felt like after giving birth. My throat (from being intubated) actually annoyed me more than anything. My entire stomach was orange from the iodine used to sterilize before surgery. I was swollen/bloated for about 4-5 days afterwards which is due to them expanding your stomach for the surgery. I was so tired for the next 48 hours.

I’ll admit I was really nervous when I first saw my incision sites. They looked disgusting to me. I was going to have these horrible scares for the rest of my life. Much to my amazement, I barely have anything now.

Especially the belly button site, you can barely see anything because the actual scare is inside of the belly button.

There were some day that looked worst than others. Dermabond, a surgical glue, was used instead of stitches, so when that started peeling I felt like I looked like someone off of a horror movie.

Other than my scars, I was advised not to shower for 24 hours after surgery, afterwards I could shower, but not bathe. No driving until I felt comfortable moving my legs to switch back and forth. I did drive a week after surgery and the seatbelt irritated incision sites, but I’m great now. I could not lift more than 10lbs and no intercourse for 2 weeks.

Full transparency – I tried my best but had to lift my toddler here and there, she was an awesome sport during the recovery though and did so much by herself, like climbing into her highchair or up on the couch without me asking. I did sit with a pillow across my stomach when sitting or laying down in bed. It was the only time it really hurt was when one of the girls accidentally hit one of the sites.

We are now just shy of one month post surgery and I am amazed how I feel. You can barely see any of my scars. I have no pain from any of them, and most importantly I no longer have the fear of getting pregnant again (though Andrew has definitely asked what if they didn’t do anything and just said they did —thanks babe).

We are so happy with our decision.

Thank you for reading through our #RoadtoTubalat30 journey.

If you missed any of the previous posts, you can read the entire series:

Feel free to tweet us at @wereparents or e-mail us at info@wereparentsblog.com if there’s any specific questions that weren’t answered that you’d like to know about.

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Worries, Doubts and Fears about a Tubal Ligation #RoadtoTubalat30

December 19, 2016 by Larisha Campbell

Read our Introduction to #RoadToTubalAt30 Series First here.

The seven days between scheduling and having our pre-op appointment was the biggest mix of emotions I’ve probably ever had in my life. Every single day I questioned if I was making the right decision.

Most of the emotions surrounded the fact that I was going to be put under general anesthesia for the surgery and the fact that it was an invasive surgery. What if I didn’t wake up? What if I bled out? Andrew barely likes being alone with the girls while I run to the store. How would he handle them by himself? Both girls would immediately be weaned from breastmilk, which would be so traumatic for them. My goal of homeschooling them would likely never happen. They’ve never been to daycare, what would happen, who would raise them?

So many questions.

Was I truly 100% sure that I would never want another child? Andrew and I were completely both in agreement, but there’s still that microcosm of wonder if it’s the right decision. We had two girls, but we both really wanted a boy. If I did this, there would never be a chance for me to biologically have a son.

While we both agreed that this was the best way to keep our family together, there was that twinge in the back of everyone’s mind of “what if we aren’t together forever?” That could be from something happening to Andrew or us just physically not being in a relationship anymore. Would I miss out on love in the future if I told someone I couldn’t physically have children anymore?

Pre-op Day.

The worries, doubts, and fears surrounding the day only exacerbated when I went in for our pre-op appointment. It was the day that our doctor made sure this was 100% our decision, answered any questions, and explained the procedure. Thankfully, she didn’t push the issue of whether or not I was sure. I knew I was, so I was praying she didn’t lecture me on only being 30. I asked a few questions like length of surgery, recovery time, etc. She then went on to explain the procedure and discuss a decision that I needed to make.

Still called a tubal ligation, I needed to decide if I wanted my tubes tied versus removed. They now recommend completely removing the tubes instead of “tying” or “burning” them. The main reason she stated was because it lowers the risk of ovarian cancer since it often starts in the tubes. Without tubes, you also remove the risk of an ectopic pregnancy. Surgery time would increase by about 10-15 minutes and I would have one additional incision site (3 instead of 2).

The biggest thing was without tubes there was 0% chance of ever getting pregnant again. There were no questions, no possibility of a reversal, it was a 100% lasting decision. Given that the benefits far outweighed any risks, we decided for a complete tubal removal. We kept the surgery on schedule and the next 11 days would continue to pose all of these questions even more until it was surgery day.

Stay tuned…..

Over the next few weeks I’m going to be writing about our decision for me to undergo a tubal ligation at 30 on Mondays and Wednesdays (2 times a week). You can follow along with #RoadtoTubalat30 –

If you missed any of the previous posts, you can read the entire series:

I hope you’ll follow along! Feel free to tweet us at @wereparents or e-mail us at info@wereparentsblog.com if there’s any specific questions that you hope we answer over the next few posts.

The Scare #RoadtoTubalat30

December 14, 2016 by Larisha Campbell

Read our Introduction to #RoadToTubalAt30 Series First here.

October 9, 2016. The scare of my life came.

Andrew and I had already decided that we wouldn’t be having any more kids. After the ups and downs over the last year and a half, we couldn’t go through anymore stress to our relationship. We wanted a happy home with happy kids who were raised by both parents. We knew another child would likely ruin that from happening.

For a week prior to this date, I was cramping and nauseous. Originally, I didn’t think anything about it. I was 16 months postpartum and still hadn’t gotten my period yet, so it had to be coming back and that’s why I was experiencing these feelings. After a week though, just for giggles, I decided I’d take a pregnancy test. I had one left in the house from the time I became pregnant with the baby. I peed on the stick and walked away. I knew it was going to be negative. I was breastfeeding two kids, I was taking my birth control religiously, and I hadn’t had my period yet (yes, I know periods aren’t an indication of ovulation…but still).

I walked back in after the designated time period to a positive test. I immediately text my best friend this….

This wasn’t a “take a guess and let me know if you see a faint line” type of pregnancy test. This was a big, fat, digital YES. Andrew had the same reaction when I told him. Holy shit, what happened. I immediately welled up with huge crocodile tears. I remember telling him, “I can’t go through this again.” I knew we could not have another child, despite my never-ending love for my girls.

I went out and bought two more tests. I took another one that evening and another the next morning.

Both said negative.

Now, we were really confused. How could I start processing these emotions if I didn’t even know? After the negative test that morning, I waited until my doctor’s office opened and called for an appointment. Luckily, they could get me in the same day. The test in the office was again, negative. The doctor told me it was likely a false positive, even though that’s insanely rare, especially with a digital test. She recommended that I wait a week, and test again.

While I was there, I asked if we could talk about having a tubal done. I kid you not, my doctor literally bust out laughing when I said this. She said that was definitely an option, but gave me information about various IUDs as an alternative she wanted me to consider.

On November 2, I ended up going off my birth control for the reasons I discussed in our last post. Within a few days of going off my birth control pills, I could tell I was feeling like a better person. I spent the next few days thoroughly researching all of my options, asking for opinions, and just doing my due diligence. Ultimately, I decided that a getting my tubes tied was the best option for my family. I read and heard personal stories about negative side effects of the various IUDs, including unexpected pregnancies and that wasn’t something I was willing to risk. On November 7, I called to schedule for my tubal ligation. I was thinking in my head they would schedule it for sometime in the beginning of 2017.

The nurse came back on the line, “Can you do the day after Thanksgiving? The 25th?”

Me: “Umm…(hesitation)..sure.”

Me in head: “Holy crap. That’s in 18 days.”

We scheduled my pre-op appointment for November 14th. The next 7 days were an extreme mixed bag of emotions.

Stay tuned…..

Over the next few weeks I’m going to be writing about our decision for me to undergo a tubal ligation at 30 on Mondays and Wednesdays (2 times a week). You can follow along with #RoadtoTubalat30

If you missed any of the previous posts, you can read the entire series:

I hope you’ll follow along! Feel free to tweet us at @wereparents or e-mail us at info@wereparentsblog.com if there’s any specific questions that you hope we answer over the next few posts.

The Last 18 Months #RoadtoTubalat30

December 12, 2016 by Larisha Campbell

Read our Introduction to #RoadToTubalAt30 Series First here.

I’m just going to get right to the point. The last 18 months have been a rocky up and down nightmare. We have had amazing moments, we have had celebrations, but we’ve had tormenting lows as well. I debated sharing this post for just as long. Ultimately, as a blogger though, my goal is to let other families, especially mothers, with this series, know they aren’t alone. While so often, we don’t talk about these feelings, it’s insanely common for them to be the reality of many moms.

I remember driving to my 6 week postpartum appointment. I told my practitioner how I’d been feeling, I answered the survey they give. She said it all sounded normal and to call back if anything changed. Looking back on this moment, I wish I would have spoken up. I walked to the car, buckled the girls into their seats, and just cried. I knew something was wrong, I knew that this was more than “baby blues”, but I didn’t speak up louder.

Nothing changed, but nothing got better.

For the next four and a half months I was on, what felt like, a roller coaster. I had these amazing moments with my kids and with Andrew, but when it wasn’t amazing, it was terrible. There was no in between. I yelled constantly. Everything annoyed me. I felt let a horrible mom. The foggy feelings would leave me so helpless I didn’t want to leave the house and the mood swings left me questioning my ability to raise my girls in a stable home, as well as hurt my relationship.

I was paranoid of everything which left me terrified to do anything.

I remember standing, making sure the garage door closed all the way because I was scared if I didn’t watch it go all the way down that someone would slide under the door before it closed. These were the types of thoughts I had. Every time, I would tell myself how crazy I was being, but I couldn’t shake it. These episodes would last weeks at a time and effect so much of my personal and professional life. Around 6 months postpartum, I couldn’t take it anymore. It wasn’t normal. I had to put my personal feelings aside and seek help.

I was diagnosed that day with Postpartum Depression and Anxiety.

That still seems so weird to say. I wasn’t supposed to have this. I wasn’t supposed to be affected. Our life was (is) great. We have two healthy kids, a beautiful house we’re remodeling, a thriving business, etc. It just went to show me that this disease can affect anyone. I went on medication that day and within a week I was feeling like a better person. My mood swings, all but disappeared. Don’t get me wrong, I still got upset with my kids, I still yelled occassionally, but for once I felt like a normal mom instead of a monster. Many of my fears went away that day. My feelings were validated and my children weren’t taken from me. I firmly believe I didn’t speak up sooner because I was terrified someone was going to take my kids.

Unfortunately, for the next year, I would still go on to have these foggy episodes, which I later learned were severe anxiety attacks, rendering me almost helpless for weeks at a time. Shortly after learning this, a friend told me that she was experiencing similar feelings and her midwife told to stop taking her birth control. We were on the same birth control, so when I asked her some odd weeks later how she was feeling and she told me much better, I knew it was something I at least had to try. I had already decided by this point that we wouldn’t be having any more children because I couldn’t go through a similiar experience with now a newborn AND two other kids. I stopped by birth control, but still currently taking my medication for the PPD. It’s been a little over 2 months now and I haven’t had any anxiety attacks since then. Our lives have been even more normal now than ever before and I’ve been so grateful to feel a sense of normalcy returning.

I’ve questioned now if I wasn’t on the same birth control after having both of our girls, if our lives would have been different and I would have wanted to try one more time for another baby.

Stay tuned…..

Over the next few weeks I’m going to be writing about our decision for me to undergo a tubal ligation at 30 on Mondays and Wednesdays (2 times a week). You can follow along with #RoadtoTubalat30

If you missed any of the previous posts, you can read the entire series:

I hope you’ll follow along! Feel free to tweet us at @wereparents or e-mail us at info@wereparentsblog.com if there’s any specific questions that you hope we answer over the next few posts.

All Hell Broke Loose #RoadtoTubalat30

December 7, 2016 by Larisha Campbell

Read our Introduction to #RoadToTubalAt30 Series First here.

**This post was actually the inspiration for this entire series…It was written 2 1/2 weeks after having our second child. I have been terrified of hitting publish on this piece since then. Well, until today.**

We left the hospital about 30 hours after I gave birth. The first week home went great. Andrew had to work the weekend after the first five days off with us and I cried about being alone with our girls but all was ok. I woke up one day the following week though and told him everything just seemed off. I couldn’t explain really what was going on at the time. I was glad he was home another week because I just couldn’t wrap my head around these feelings.

Foggyness. Almost like a déjà vu feeling. Dizziness. Confusion. Those are the three feelings I experienced most often. I was terrified to be left alone with my girls. But I only told him. He just kept telling me my feelings were normal. That I was strong and would be fine. I would get through this.

Sunday came. It was our last day home together. I woke up at 7am and decided to try to treat most of the day as if he wasn’t here so I could see how I did. The girls and I got up and I went downstairs to get breakfast for Serenity and I. I made sure to make myself a bagel and a smoothie to try to help with nutrition.

The feelings continued.

I nursed the girls. Played. And started laundry as I normally would. Around 8:30am Andrew came down and made himself breakfast. I hugged him and tears just rolled down my face. I felt like a stranger in my own home. He again just said it would all be ok.

I started to clean. Sweeping the floor, cleaning the counters. What I really wanted to do was hide in a corner with the lights off and just cry. Maybe a really good cry was what I needed. But I knew it wasn’t. I had cried so many times over the past few days I knew it wouldn’t help anything.

It was time to nurse the baby again. I went through the actions but never really felt present. As she unlatched I began to burp her. The world just kept spinning and before I knew it I snapped back into reality to realize that the baby had thrown up all over me.

It was terrifying.

What if she gagged while throwing up and I wasn’t coherent enough to realize what just happened. I was terrified that my child was going to die in my hands because I couldn’t snap out of this fog. I was constantly checking on her when she made or didn’t make the tiniest noise because I was scared to miss something and cause her harm. I constantly asked Andrew if he had Serenity because I didn’t remember if she had gone upstairs with him or if I was supposed to be watching her.

It was time to go to the store.

Typically, I try to meal plan but just decided that I would figure it out as the week went along with what we had at home and just get what was on the list for now. I remember looking out the window on the way there. The world was zooming past me and I had no concentration on the world at hand. When we got there I placed the baby in the carrier and Andrew got Serenity out. She was screaming. She wanted to walk but Andrew wanted her in the cart. Her cries were muffled by my racing thoughts throughout the 40 minutes or so in the store. Occasionally, trying to console her, but knowing nothing I did would really calm her down. Just praying we would be able to get out of the store quickly before anyone I knew noticed us. Up and down each aisle looking at all the items but not really putting anything inside the cart. Grabbing a few things here and there in no particular rhyme or reason and just praying I grabbed enough for us to survive the week.

We got home and I took the girls upstairs for a nap. It was the one thing I seemed to be able to do right. Get us to sleep at the right time…together. My mind raced. I couldn’t fall asleep today myself.

I listened to the soft breaths each of my girls took separately. At least I was keeping them alive today. But, how was I going to survive alone with both girls with no help. Starting so soon. Only one more sleep tonight before I was all alone tomorrow. I couldn’t stop the tears from falling down my face. I was going to mess something up. I was going to fail at this miserably. One of them would get hurt–burned–suffer some how.

I googled my symptoms. Foggyness was the one I focused on because it seemed like if I could get out of the fog that everything else would fall into place. Article after article came back as it being a sign of PPD. Consult my doctor immediately. But I wasn’t depressed. I didn’t want to be labeled. I didn’t want medication. My mom was on medication for depression since I was a child and still on it and didn’t seem happy most days. I didn’t want to be that mom while on medication. What was the point? It clearly didn’t help. Plus– I didn’t feel depressed. Just foggy. I knew I couldn’t bring up PPD to Andrew because I had when Serenity was about 6 months old and the conversation went south quickly. He simply didn’t understand how I could be depressed with so much positive things happening in our life. Eventually I feel like I got passed it on my own with some minor set backs here and there.

But this was different. Then, I felt truly depressed. Sad. Miserable. But not now. I was happy. Happy to have my girls and my life. It was just the motions of life not making sense.

Did I say something to someone? Now or later? Should I just keep trucking along praying that one day everything would just fall back into place? Was I risking my daughters’ lives if I did that?

So many “what ifs”. Though I feel like I’ve always loved a what if life experience. But these what ifs were different. What if one of them drowned in the tub? What if I forgot one of them somewhere? What if we went outside and I forgot one of them out there? What if I thought one of them was somewhere in the house but weren’t and got hurt doing something else because I was paying attention?

I finally understood why some of those crazy news stories happened with parents of young children. I had no thoughts of harming my girls, but what if they did get hurt…

I asked Andrew to listen for the girls while I went and grabbed a shower. I took a shower everyday but I didn’t do much else. I barely remembered to put deodorant on and I knew I hadn’t brushed my hair since the day after we got home from the hospital. But the shower had to help right. I could sit down and let the water run over me and it would wash away all the thoughts. All the craziness. And then no one would have to know.

Stay tuned…..

Over the next few weeks I’m going to be writing about our decision for me to undergo a tubal ligation at 30 on Mondays and Wednesdays (2 times a week). You can follow along with #RoadtoTubalat30

If you missed any of the previous posts, you can read the entire series:

I hope you’ll follow along! Feel free to tweet us at @wereparents or e-mail us at info@wereparentsblog.com if there’s any specific questions that you hope we answer over the next few posts.

Second pregnancy – What the hell was I thinking? #RoadToTubalAt30

December 5, 2016 by Larisha Campbell

Read our Introduction to #RoadToTubalAt30 Series First here.

I knew parenting was going to be hard, but I never knew just how hard it was going to be. After the ups and downs of having just one, Andrew and I both considered that she may be an only child. The mood swings and depression I had, while undiagnosed, almost cost us our entire relationship. Luckily for us, we are both stubborn as mules and refused to give up on our happiness together.

Shortly before Serenity’s second birthday though, I was having aversion to nursing and my boobs were so sore. While I was no longer taking birth control, I was in denial I was pregnant. But…I was pregnant! Okay, I thought, this can be a good thing. I can have a boy, and then we can be really done. Andrew said he was done as soon as we found out, followed up with a resounding “NO MORE” once we found out it was another girl, and once I hit my third trimester I knew she would be the last. Friends would joke with me that there was no way I would be done, but I knew I was.

The second pregnancy was emotionally draining for me (I wrote about it here). Having a two year old jump on your belly accidentally, want to play constantly while you just want to take a nap because you are growing a human, and most of all refuse to give up nursing is exhausting y’all. There were times when my nursing aversion was so bad that I literally felt like I could just throw her across the room. My skin would crawl. Add that to a pregnancy and it’s an emotional cocktail mixed for disaster.

I wanted to spend as much time as I possibly could with her before her sister arrived, but I needed me time. I needed time to rest. I was touched out. How in the world was I bringing another life into this world when I felt some days I could barely keep up with the one I already had. These emotions would leave me crying most days and while I would joke about how it was all the pregnancy hormones, it was really the beginning of realizing this would be the last time I ever felt the magic of growing a human being inside of me….

Stay tuned…..

Over the next few weeks I’m going to be writing about our decision for me to undergo a tubal ligation at 30 on Mondays and Wednesdays (2 times a week). You can follow along with #RoadtoTubalat30

If you missed any of the previous posts, you can read the entire series:

I hope you’ll follow along! Feel free to tweet us at @wereparents or e-mail us at info@wereparentsblog.com if there’s any specific questions that you hope we answer over the next few posts.

No More Babies #RoadToTubalAt30 Series

November 28, 2016 by Larisha Campbell

If you happened to catch our Facebook page over the holiday weekend, you may have seen that I had surgery on Friday. Specifically, I was going in for a tubal ligation with complete removal of tubes. I know based on messages from a few people who knew before and then others that were just hearing about it, that some people thought I must have gone crazy. We have two beautiful girls, 4 and (almost) 18 months, but how could we be done having kids? Weren’t we going to try for a boy? I am only 30, didn’t I want to *make sure* I was done? There were other options besides surgery, hadn’t I considered those? After having kids, I’ve realized that people say anything when they don’t know the back story behind someone’s decisions. Luckily, I already planned to write this series when I made my decision.

The truth is that of course I’ve considered all these questions. I wouldn’t be making an educated decision without thinking of them right?

Let’s go way back for a minute. Before we had any children, I never really had a set number in mind. At least two kids and I wanted a boy. Those were my two “goals”. I quickly learned after having my first, that nothing in parenting is ever going to go how anticipated.

My baby wasn’t going to sleep in our bed ….we co-sleep.
Our kids weren’t going to eat in the car…they do.
They wouldn’t throw tantrums in public….HAHAHAHAHHA

Nothing has happened as expected. We didn’t get a boy. It wasn’t all sunshine and roses. Parenting was and is so daggone hard. Ultimately, I have discovered that you have to block out all the naysayers and do what works best for your family and primarily yourself. No one else is carrying these babies for you and even having the most supportive partner in the world, the mom is still left to be the primary caretaker in a majority of situations.

Over the next few weeks I’m going to be writing about our decision for me to undergo a tubal ligation at 30 on Mondays and Wednesdays (2 times a week). You can follow along with #RoadtoTubalat30

If you missed any of the previous posts, you can read the entire series:

I hope you’ll follow along! Feel free to tweet us at @wereparents or e-mail us at info@wereparentsblog.com if there’s any specific questions that you hope we answer over the next few posts.

10 Ways to Help New Moms

July 29, 2016 by Larisha Campbell

Learn more about the Wing Woman campaign on Twitter @mywingwoman or read more helpful tips at www.mywingwoman.com. I received compensation for this blog post from Teva Women’s Health.

It takes a village to raise a family. We’ve all heard the phrase. However, as our society becomes more and more online based, less personal, we frequently forget what things we can actually be doing to help our close friends and those that truly need support in their moment of need. One of those moments are right after someone has a baby.

Three and a half years ago, when I first had our daughter Skibbles, I had no idea what I was in store for when I brought her home. I had babysat kids since I was 11 or 12 years old. I had “helped raise” my best friend’s son and my nieces. Yet, here I was with this insanely small human and found myself at a loss on how to get everything completed. How did I get dinner on the table? How did I shower? How did I get laundry and grocery shopping and simple errands done? All I knew is that this little human just wanted me to hold her and hated the car. Fast forward to baby #2 and I found myself asking many of the same questions and then some. How did I keep the toddler occupied while I breastfed? How did I keep up with dishes for now four people? How did I even function with two kids now?

Luckily, I had an incredible team of amazing wing women in my life that made those first few days at home easier as we adjusted to life as a family of four.

Here’s 10 things that an amazing wing woman in my life has done or I have done for others.

Bring A Meal (or 3)
- As much as we say we are going to freezer prep 6 months worth of dinners, most of us are lucky if we do seven meals. Help us out and bring a meal, preferably one that can be frozen in case someone else already brought dinner over. Better yet, bring something like muffins or grab and go snacks for us to have throughout the day.
Take the older children outside (or away for a day if we are close friends/family)
- New moms want to rest. Older kids tend to be needy. Help!
Clean the dishes
- No one ever feels like doing this. Ever. Let alone someone that just pushed an entire being out of their body. The last thing we want to do is stand at the sink and clean the dishes
Do the Laundry
- It piles up fast, especially with a newborn. A new mom doesn’t care if you didn’t do it perfectly or folded towels in the opposite direction she normally does. Just don’t wash 5 loads and leave them all for her to fold.
Grab things off their grocery list
- At the store? Text or call and see if she needs anything. Drop it off at her doorstep without having to come inside.
Clean up the house
- See toys everywhere? Put them all in one pile. Dirty counter? Wipe it down. Toilet needs scrubbed? Do it. Any little thing you can see, just help.
Run any errands needed
- Maybe something needs to go to the post office, the dog needs to go to the vet, or she needs to pick up a prescription — whatever you can see she needs help with, do.
Take pictures
- Moms always take pictures of their baby with someone else, but most people don’t think of taking pictures of the mom in the moment. Do this favor for her so she has something to treasure forever. Bonus points: Print out and give her the pictures you’ve taken.
Leave
I know this may sound harsh, but help out and then leave. No one wants to entertain right after having a baby. Rest is key. Don’t ask to hold the baby if she doesn’t offer, don’t sit around and ask what’s for dinner, don’t ask her to get you anything.
Stop by after the first two weeks
- Everyone always wants to stop by and see a new squishy baby, but after the first two weeks, no one calls to come by anymore. The first 6 weeks are the hardest, come by after the first two weeks.

And two things not to do. Don’t ask to hold the baby. If mom is okay with you holding the baby, she will offer the baby to hold. Also, don’t say “let me know if I can do anything”, just do it. Most people don’t want to be an inconvenience. A wing woman is someone that helps you with all your needs. Be the wing woman you hoped that someone was to you!

I was selected for this opportunity as a member of Clever Girls and the content and opinions expressed here are all my own.

Reflections of Mother’s Day- Moments with the last baby

May 25, 2016 by Larisha Campbell

This is a sponsored post written by me on behalf of Disney Baby for IZEA. All opinions are 100% mine

This past Mother’s Day was my first as a mama of two. This past year has flown by as we are now preparing to celebrate our baby’s first birthday. Since she is likely our last child, I have been embracing every possible moment that I can with her. I hold her a little tighter. I kiss her a little more. I brush her hair a little slower. I try to keep her baby-like as long as I possibly can. Much to my displeasure, she just keeps growing.

As a mom, we always want to keep our children as little as possible for as long as possible, but when it comes to “the last baby”, that feeling elevates to unprecedented heights. Every day she looks a little older. Every day she does something that reminds me how much she is growing. Every day she makes me look at her older sister and realize while the days are long, the years are short and there’s only the matter of a blink of an eye before she’s doing the stuff her older sister is doing.

I sit back and watch her and her sister and can’t help but tear up some days as I see the magical bond between them together. Knowing that our baby will never experience life as an older sibling. She will always be the baby. The bond between these two girls is insanely beautiful. Of course, the older one gets upset when the baby messes up her doll house or knocks down her castle, but the really amazing moments are the ones that shine deep in my mama heart. Those moments when she sings to her sister to help her stop crying. The moments where she tells her sister that she’s adorable. The moments where she hands her something to eat because I can’t get to her fast enough.

Being a mama is the hardest, yet most magical, amazing, and beautiful thing that I’ve ever done and I’m so thankful and incredibly blessed to be able to call these girls mine. She’s the last baby, but the moments we share together are incredibly special.

Disney Baby at Walmart carries the most adorable Minnie Mouse products to share your own mommy and daughter moments. We encourage you to check out all their available products and head to your local Walmart to pick up something today!

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