What I wish someone told me as a new mom

What I wish someone told em as a new mom is a piece to all new moms on the journey of feeling like they are missing something.

I’m not going to lie to you. I’m going to tell you exactly what I wish someone told me as a new mom.

I see you.

You feel alone.

You probably aren’t alone, though maybe you are. But the world feels so….damn….isolating right now.

And yet, you have this tremendous task to take care of an entire human being.

Hold on. What the actual fuck?

Where is the manual? Where is the guidance? They seriously are going to let you just walk out of the hospital with a whole human being. THIS IS WILD. So many more questions to ask. What is the hotline number when I have questions? Huh? There’s not one!? I’m going to fail.

Breathe.

People ask how they can help and deep down you just want to scream. Don’t they see everything that needs done? Why are you the only one that can? No, I don’t want you to hold the baby I just birthed, I WANT TO HOLD THE BABY I JUST BIRTHED. I want YOU to do everything else.

Breathe.

The baby is crying now. I’ve changed the baby. Feed the baby. Put clothes on the baby. Taken the clothes off the baby. Sang to the baby. Baby is still crying. OH MY GOSH WHAT DO I DO!?

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

Over the next 18 years you are going to feel this immense joy at this tiny human that you created, while at the same time, feel like you are failing at every single second guessing moment. The pressure that society has put us in is not an easy one to deal with. Very few moms actually have the true help they need and feel supported in their motherhood journey.

What I wish someone would have told me though is not that the newborn stage is hard and it will pass quickly, but EVERY stage of parenting is hard.

So what I now say to new moms is:

• I see you.
• You are not alone.
• Every stage of parenting is hard. This one will pass, but the next one is hard too, just different.

Now, let’s pause another moment to breathe.

Motherhood is also wonderful and there’s joyous moments at every stage as well. Those newborn smiles or the first words or them learning to read all the way to the first crush and beyond are all wonderful.

You are on this crazy roller coaster ride that will bring you so much joy.

But I’m not going to lie and say it’s easy.

I’m going to tell you what I wish someone told be as a new mom.

Hang in there. You got this. You’re doing great.